Monday, May 23, 2011

How Many Times Do you Have to Buy Your Home? | Bonaire Island Real ...

How Many Times Do you Have to Buy your Home?

Coconut Palm

Coconut Palm

Buyers have to ?buy? their home four times.? The first buy is to ?sell? their spouse/partner on the importance of buying.? For the vast majority of couples if the wife wants to own the home, she will get her way.

If the wife does not want to buy the home I assure you the husband or partner is going to have his work cut out for himself.? Buying a house should be a very happy time.? It is really important that couples start out on the same page in selecting a home.

It is very uncomfortable for everyone when the buying couple is fighting about the house.? Having been a witness to many of those situations I assure you nobody should go forward buying a home when they are not in complete agreement about buying.

The second ?buy? the buyers must make is to family.? Family is defined as children, parents and sometimes very close friends.? The dynamics of these family relationships are always complex usually very dramatic and often tragic.

In many families children seem to rule the roost.? Sadly, manipulative children have often dashed the dreams of their parents.? When parents of adult buyers are involved in the process, especially when they are financial contributors to the process, it almost always is a messy emotionally dramatic tumultuous purchase.

Anything that can be done by manipulative children can be done many times over by manipulative parents.? When children have decision-making veto power in home buying they usually get their way.? When parents have decision making input power in a home purchase of their children, the purchase almost always fails.? When those parents have actual decision making power the purchase almost always fails.? These are very ugly transactions that are upsetting and demeaning to all.

As a seller if you learn that there are family dynamics of this type on the buying side, you may do well to keep your property on the market.

The third time a buyer has to buy the property is with the appraiser.? From the buyer?s perspective this is usually the easiest sale.? The buyer feels if the property appraises he has proof of the value of the property and the wisdom of the purchase.? If the property does not appraise most of the time the buyer simply tells the seller I will buy but only at the lower appraised value.

Essentially the buyer tells the seller, ?sell it to me now or sell it to someone else perhaps in weeks or months either way you cannot sell for more than the appraised price?.

The fourth time the buyer has to get approval for the sale is often the hardest.? It is also a surprise to most people.? The toughest ?sale? for the buyer is often with the sellers.? Buying couples are usually on the same page that they want to buy.? They may disagree about a particular house but they do agree they want to buy something.

Sellers often do not agree about the idea of selling making it very difficult to agree as to price terms and conditions.? Death disease and divorce are the three ?Ds? of selling.

Death often leaves the surviving spouse having to deal with co owners of children, stepchildren, or family he or she have never acknowledged or liked.? Just the mechanics of probate can disrupt the entire process.

Serious disease creates financial and emotional stresses that often cloud rational thinking on the part of sellers.? Often the spouses have different agendas because of the illness and those agendas take them into conflicting even opposite directions.

Divorce often makes selling a house impossible.? Whatever one spouse wants the other has a knee jerk and opposite reaction.? Divorcing spouses cannot agree on selling, agents, price, terms, conditions, repairs anything.? Many times they are so distrustful of everyone they retain their own real estate agents and then fight over commission, negotiating, authority, and responsibility.? They fight over everything.

Even in happy selling couples, the process may be a backdrop for playing out their internal dynamics and power struggles.? These situations can be extremely complex as the sands are always shifting.

Even people who have bought and sold several houses rarely think about or in terms of the dynamics of the sale and what usually happens.? Everyone seems to have a ?happy valley? belief that everyone is kind, considerate rational and all are in pursuit the common goal of a sale.

Sometimes they are right.? Most of the time experience teaches us that they are wrong.? Right or wrong a great agent can get everyone through the dynamics and to a successful closing.

Source: http://bonaireislandrealestate.com/2011/05/20/how-many-times-do-you-have-to-buy-your-home/

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